


This Is Not A Happy Poem

by towritemeanstolive



Category: Every Fandom?, No Fandom, Poetry - Fandom, poem - Fandom, poems - Fandom
Genre: Again, Also Have Like 4 More Poem Ideas, And Forget What It's About 5 Minutes Later, Any Ideas For Actual Good Tags?, But I Suck At It, Cause That Happened Like 2 Weeks Ago, Creative, Creativity, Depression, Didn't Write Anything In Ages, Emotions, English, Ew Right?, Getting Better Now Tho, I Have Like 8 Fanfiction Ideas, I Say That Now, I Should've Written Something When I Had A Breakdown, I Wrote A Thing Again, Is No Fun, It Kind Of Escalated, Keep Fighting, LMAO, Live, Low Quality Language, No Rhymes, Poems, Poetic, Poetry, Poetry Slam, Procrastinating, Rhymes, Slam Poetry, So Let's Call This, Stylistic Devices Who?, This Is About, What Will I Write First, When Will I Write Those, Write A Poem, bare with me, being strong, but okay, creative writing, emotions..., i love poetry, life - Freeform, mental health, okay i'm done now, practice, surprise surprise, thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-26
Updated: 2017-10-26
Packaged: 2019-01-23 16:34:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 338
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12511604
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/towritemeanstolive/pseuds/towritemeanstolive
Summary: I wanted to write something again and was really motivated, but because of the lack of practice and just using my brain that way, I couldn't come up with anything good. So don't expect anything good. This really is just practice. But it's important to post it in a way I guess?I noticed slight changes in my thinking lately, started from there and ended somewhere else.It has some kind of motivating parts, but it's definitely not happy and there's this general sad-ish mood!?To finish with something not so sad: Whatever you're going through: You're strong. Keep fighting. The "demons inside your head" do not define who you are and you really will get better one day! AND it's definitely worth fighting for! I believe in you!(Oh and if anyone ever wants to talk about anything or rant or ask for opinions or do whatever, DM me on my Instagram @conductor.of.spook (It's going to be @conductor.of.bees again soon). I'm always there to talk with you, lend an ear and support!)





	This Is Not A Happy Poem

I know that I am not okay

And might never be

But I know that that should be okay

So I accepted me that way

 

I know I have demons inside my head

And I know there are many of them

I know one's more powerful than the other

And I know what they desire

But should I give in?

Do I give in?

These demons they feed upon my strength

I'm in a battle of willpower

Who will win?

I have breakdowns every month and

Of course

I wish I didn't

But they show me I'm alive and fighting

They show me there's still hope and lightning

Inside Me

They show me I'm resisting to be weak

Resisting to give up

Exhausting like running a marathon

Feeling deadly like heart attacks

But little reanimations

Simultaneously

 

You know

They say

"There is no light without darkness"

And isn't that a beautiful, upsetting truth?

It happens so that my worst days have often been my best days too

Sometimes dark and light are not related

But identical

 

I don't wish to turn back time

That would just screw things up

Because I wouldn't be who I am today

Maybe I would be better

But probably just different

And if I wasn't who I am today

Both bad and good'd be gone

Good is not always the optimum

And sometimes it really hurts

And now if you just think a bit

They're anyway just words

Sense:

Good and bad are inventions by society whose meaning an individual ought to define only for themselves

Subjective

Emotional

So this is my conclusion

Shouldn't I be grateful for both?

Look forward to the following?

Be curious what it might bring?

And accept every feeling?

Reminder:

No feeling is final

 

I never wanted to die

But now I finally found my reason to live

And in the end there's always hope

The hope that one day I can say

"I'm okay"

Without having to lie

Because guess what

Even sad people want to

                                                                                                                                                           _Live_.

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave a kudos if you liked it and comment! I'd appreciate it!


End file.
